In Korea, they have this delicacy/side dish/food staple called Kimchi. It is made from cabbages and other veggies, then mixed with spicy pepper paste and fish pastes and then compressed inside a stone pot, which is put undergrund for a few days to "develop" a unique taste.
Koreans love their kimchi so much they actually thought up hundreds or so different ways to make it! There's the basic red kimchi and white kimchi and sweet kimchi and even kimchi soup! It all depends on which region you go to, they will have their own unique version of kimchi. Check out the websites and you'll notice that native Koreans also agree that non-koreans will find it hard to develop the same love for kimchi as they do (given that they're weather there is at worst, cool and not hot) I think that if we had snow and winter and the other 3 seasons, then we'd be fans of kimchi too. We'd develop a weird hankering for this strange tasting dish that is very spicy and yet not so very tasty to our tongues (although it can never compare to our kare-kare and basic adobo! They love spicy food and even spicy snacks (think of siopao with sili inside) because it helps them bear their weather better. I wish I could go around wearing a thick neon pink winter coat all day too.
I think people think up of different ways to do things in order to help them adapt to certain things. Maybe the people in the Upper northern section of Korea find it hard to come across peppers, so more white kimchi is made there than on any other part of the country. The point i'm driving at is not that I am going to go on and on about this, but rather that I see myself adapting the same ways with regards to what I am lacking right now.
Specifically speaking, I am lacking him.
But it's really funny how I keep bumping into all sorts of people from my past whom I think the Big Guy up there is trying to send my way so as to distract me from my current and eternal obsession. Not that I am attracted to them anymore. In fact, I feel sad knowing they will never be as appealing as they once were to me. Kinda makes me shudder thinking about what wouldve happened had I ended up with any of these men, only to lose all interest in them a few years later.
I have been called up, buggered through text messages, stopped in the road, asked out for lunch and still, I am not biting. Like a lazy fish whose gobbled up too may thin worms, I refuse to take the bait. A good friend specifically ordered me not to think too much about this, but I just can't help but to wallow.
I went crazy last Sunday and hied off to Divisoria in the middle of the afternoon with my unknowing cousins in tow. Used up all my money buying my version of local kimchi fare (korean movies, series, products). It satisfied my longing, for now. I am broke, but happy. still sad, but not alone.
"If you always spend your time thinking about how to get over the past, how the hell are you going to get on with your future?!"