Thursday, August 31, 2006

I'm Happy, you think?

Aren't consistent people wonderful?
The good are always on or near the good path while the bad stay on theirs.
There isn't much figuring out to be done.
No wishywashyness going on. No shocking news. Life is steady.
I'm too old for surprises.

I think consistency is a sign of a strong character.
It takes guts to be true to who you are, to adhere to what you believe in, and to never waiver in opinion, despite the odds.
I'm not assuming you are consistently good. In fact, you may as well be consistently bad, and I'd probably still respect you anyway. I prefer to see the true colors rather than the fabricated pretty ones.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Dark Chocolate

There's alot I have to be thankful for today.
But not all exactly in a perfect way.

Sometimes gratitude comes in the form of long-lost friends who call up out-of-the-blue just to check in on you. I guess true friends are like that. They stick with you even if you think your the most horribly unagreeable person in the whole wide world already. Or maybe, they've ESP-ed their way into your brain to weed out any a**holes you might be associating with instead of them. My friend Joey is like this. God knows why she still keeps me. I am about as useful to her as a mud-ugly, deflated football(and she doesn't even play either). We had our days/months/years even, where we lost touch, but she just manages to reconnect and it's like we never missed a days worth of gossip in each others lives. Thanks for coming back jo.

Sometimes closure can come in the form of news. Good or bad, news is news. I had been wanting to hear news about someone whom I hoped to god did not die a horrible death or get all his fingers, lips, and ears cut off (which was supposed to logically explain why he has not replied to any form of communication). A friend even suggested I pray for news, which I did. Not exactly the type to engage in fervent dialogue with God everyday, I prayed. Not for what I wanted, but for him to get what he wanted. And I guess he did. Thankfully, he did not get any of his appendages cut off, nor is he living on the streets. He is, as I can assume, happy and well. And better off without me.

Sometimes regret can come in the form of two things: action or inaction. You either regret not doing something, or you regret something you did which you wish you had not done in the first place. I usually pride myself in saying I have no regrets. Ha. Who am I kidding? Apparently, almost all my regrets were regrets of action taken. Too much action, apparently, is enough to kill any kind of relationship. Maybe things will be better if I just took the backseat view from now on....

Sometimes happiness comes in the form of cheap thrills like spending the day exactly the way you want it. Last Wednesday felt like my birthday. It was great. I guess spending time with family can do that to you. I finally convinced the fam to wake up at the ungodly hour of 6am and hie off to a water spa for an early morning dip. swear to god I love those hot, hot, hot herbal pools. But what i love most is dunking myself in the ice-cold whirlpool afterwards (I swear to god, it would freeze my balls off, if I had any. I kid you not!). Then we had breakfast, followed by coffee and cappuccino cheesecake afterwards. Then it was off to work. My perfect day.

Sometimes love for work can come in the most mundane of circumstances. It's great when you chance upon people purchasing your magazine. But it's a a million times greater when you see them walk out of the store and hurriedly open the mag just to see whats inside already. This lady I shared the elevator with couldn't even wait til she got to her car to check out what's in our latest issue. Now if that isn't the biggest compliment, I don't know what is....

Tuesday, August 01, 2006


The rains finally stopped today.
Time to bring out the leggings and ballet flats again.
I've been hiding under layers and layers of sloppy clothing the past few days (great excuse to wear two jackets at the same time.)
So easy to slide into that routine of looking androgynous and apathetic.
The thing with clothing, even when you try not to look like you pieced together an outift, whether you just opted for grunge or sporty or goth, truth is you still cared enough to choose what to wear to pull off that exact un-put-together look.
An ex of mine once commented "You dress like you just put on whatever you got from your closet without looking, at least that's what you want people to think."
Much to my dismay, he's right. I have to agree.
I won't wear just anything.
A girl has got to have some standards, at least in that department.