Tuesday, December 28, 2004

One helluva maybe

So am I or am I not in love with him?

I try not to think about this too much because I do not want to be lured into entertaining this ludicrous thought (although I am obviously failing miserably). I want to go about my day to day as if these thoughts had never crossed my mind (ever!).

You see I love my best friend. But I am not in love with him.

I love it that I can call him on and off all day at all hours. I love it that I am constantly in touch with him and he doesn't mind it one bit (not even a tiny bit!). I love it that he actually texts or call back on time at ALL times. Now why would I want to change any of that?

My dreams do not rule me, but they help me see........

But what do I see? In my waking reality, I am happy with the few (but true blue) friends I have, the good (affordable) food I get to eat and the wonderful (underground) stuff I have already read and seen. i am not in want for anything that might be jarring to any of that. I am not up for any scary roller coaster ride (figurative or otherwise).

I guess It's because I'm still single that I start to see myself (in my weird head) being paired off with other eligible (yet incompatible) guys.
Since I am closest to my best friend, he was an obvious target. Poor guy.
It was warm and fuzzy feeling in my dream, but that's all it was, just a dream.
And a dream it will remain.

Because I love my best friend, he will forever stay where he is. Closest to my heart :)

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